Potty Training

I've been thinking lately, and I've decided there's at least one more course that should be added to our school curriculum. How To Use The Toilet 101. Apparently this is a serious problem for the patrons of fast food. It is absolutely ridiculous the number of times I go to the bathroom and have to wipe pee off the women's toilet seat. This actually happened to me twice today alone. What I want to really know is, how do you miss??? YOU HAVE TO SIT DOWN TO PEE. Or maybe that's just the way I was raised? I'm pretty sure if you're a girl, you should have your butt on the toilet seat.

 I suppose there are the people that try to hover (f*ck that, I'll sit my big butt down), because heaven forbid you sit on a public toilet seat. If that's the case, HOLD IT 'TIL YOU GET HOME. Or you can always wipe the toilet seat down first... We do have toilet paper right next to the toilet. And anyways, the seat is probably cleaner (unless of course there's piss/shit on it) than most of the other stuff in the bathroom, i.e.- sink handle, toilet seat handle, door handle...


However, I can't blame 100% of the mess on women. I know for a fact that there are some men who use the women's restroom because it's cleaner. DAMN STRAIGHT IT'S CLEANER. LEAVE IT THAT WAY!

^I really wish we could hang up a sign like this.

Another thing I've noticed is that there are a surprising amount of people who don't wash their hands.


I was standing in the hall, waiting for the restroom the other day. I didn't think I would have to wait long because right before I knocked I heard our squeaky toilet paper holder, so I didn't bother knocking. A few seconds later, the toilet flushed. As I'm standing there wondering how much longer she'll be, the door opens. She walks out and our eyes meet. Talk about awkward. We both looked away, her probably because she was ashamed that she got caught not washing her hands, and I so I didn't give her a disgusted look and get in trouble.


Don't you know how unhealthy that can be?! Also, how lazy can you be?? It's not like it's a hard thing to do... Takes about 20 seconds (if you do it right) and probably another 20 seconds to dry them (depending on the dryer). You'll appreciate it one day when you realized you don't have to make as many doctors' visits because you don't have any illnesses that you got because you ate food after not wiping.

Would you do this at your house?

Apparently there are some customers who think that we are some type of classy restaurant, because they leave their food/trays/trash on the tables, like we have bus boys who we pay to go pick up after you.

Are you serious right now??

We have trash cans in there so you can throw away your trash when you're done. And they're like 3 feet from the door that you walk out of. In fast food we are supposed to keep the dining room clean, yes, but when you leave your food/trays/trash on the tables, it just makes you look lazy and dirty. Do you do that at home? Leave your plates and unfinished food on your kitchen table? If you do, you're disgusting. Maybe you should think about hiring a maid. Except for you probably spend all your money at fast food places so you don't have to clean up after yourself at home.

Another thing you should hire a maid for is to clean your toilet seats. Like any normal day, I had to go to the bathroom later in the evening. When I went in, the first thing I saw was brown stains on the back inner rim of the toilet seat. 

How do you do that? It looks like you tried to wipe your butt using the toilet seat. I bet you didn't get it all. There were also brown stains on the bar that is meant to be used by handicapped people to help them get up. They probably got that there after they tried to wipe off whatever the toilet seat didn't get and somehow got something on their hand. And then maybe they got another 'wave' after wiping, so they had to remain on the toilet. I also found poop stains on the front ends of the rim and just underneath the inside. That's even more confusing. Like they had to grab the toilet seat to get up after Round 2. So I had the joy of cleaning that up tonight. I hope you wouldn't do that at your house. That is definitely more disgusting than the first point of my post.

If you do do (no pun intended) either of these things at home, well...

Litterbug

Almost everyone is a Litterbug, whether you want to admit it or not. And if you're not, congratulations, you are one of the few. 

My guess is a lot of the litter we see on a daily basis comes from people throwing trash out their car window. I've done this before, I'll admit it. I've noticed I usually try to do it when I think no one's looking, as if that's going to make it less bad for the environment. I'm gonna guess that I'm not the only one who thinks this. 

I'm also not the only one who knows that it is, in fact, bad. Everyone who comes through my drive-thru litters. Well, most everyone. And most of them try to do it when I'm not looking. And it frustrates me. A lot. I'm not quite sure why. Maybe it's because they think they're getting away with it. They think they were smooth, waiting until I turned to get their napkins or sauces. But they weren't. Aren't. I guess that makes me a little hypocritical.

AND THEN there's the people who don't even wait until I turn around. They immediately open their straw and throw the wrap out the window. REALLY? Right in front of my face?!? C'mon now... That's just rude.

I think there was only one time when I was okay with it. Wanna know when? Sure you do. So I'll tell you.

I gave a guy his drink and straw, and before I even had a chance to turn completely, he promptly opened his wrapper and threw it out his window. It was raining that night, and the wrapper stuck to his car door. I gave him the most exasperated look I could muster, (un)fortunately he didn't see it. So I waited for his order to be ready, and then as I was handing it out to him, I told him that his wrapper was stuck to the door. He gave me an extremely embarrassed look as he grabbed the wrapper off his door and said thank you and drove away. And he did not throw it back out the window. I was actually pretty proud of myself, not gonna lie.

Moral of the story: everyone, including me, should start keeping one of those car trash cans, and use it.

Window Problems

I used to have a 1991 Honda Accord. That put her at about 2 years younger than I was, so I wasn't too surprised when she started falling apart. One of the most irritating things that happened was the windows locking. It happened two or three times. One, it was spring, and it was raining. I had to have trash bags in at least two windows to keep rain from getting in the car. Another time it happened it was summer, and the windows got stuck in the up position. Talk about ironic.


One thing I tried not to do while my windows were broken was go through a fast food drive-thru. I always went inside, 1- because it was easier and 2- because I was kind of embarrassed. I mean, I know these things happen, so I can't really get too upset if you don't feel embarrassed about it.


There's not a law (at least I'm pretty sure there's not) saying that you can't go through the drive-thru if your window's broken, but if you do here are a few tips to follow:


1) When you pull up, pull up just a little past the speaker. If you pull too far the speaker will beep like you pulled off and we won't hear your order and then you'll come to the window mad.


1A) Or if it's just your driver's window that's stuck up, you can always have the person in the back seat order.


2) After pulling past the speaker, open your door. When you open your door you should be looking right at the speaker, and we should be able to hear you.


3) Speak loudly (without yelling) and clearly. Don't get frustrated or miffed if we have to ask you to repeat yourself a couple of times. You want us to get your order right, don't you?


4) After you finish placing your order and get your total, pull up to just a little past the window. This way, when you open your door you should just be able to lean back and stick your arm out and the window should be right there.


4A) Please open your door all the way. Don't just try and stick your wrist out the door. That makes it very difficult to not only give you your change, but your drinks and food as well. And it makes it very hard to hear your response to any questions we have, such as if you want sauces or forks.


4B) Please have your money ready. It's difficult enough as it is without you taking the time to get out of your car and into your backseat.


5) If you do need to get out of your car to pay us, please let us know. If you don't, it kind of looks like someone's comin' at us and we'll shut the window.


5A) Don't stand creepin' in the window while you wait for your change. It's just... well... creepy. If you start looking around inside it looks like you're trying to get the layout and see how many people we have, and we start to get worried.




So that was easy enough, right?


Thank you, and have a nice day!

Multiple orders

Normally when you go through drive-thru you only have one order (yours), and if you have multiple people/orders you come inside. Our dining room closes at ten o'clock, so all we can do is take drive-thru customers. It's understandable if people need to pay separately because they have two separate methods of payment, which is when I don't mind making two orders. What irritates me is when customers surprise me with it. Sneaking it in right before they're done, like they think they're slick or that I would have said no if they had told me in the beginning.

Me: "Is that everything?"

Customer: "That's everything for the first order."

Me: "You have a second order?" *facepalm*

Customer: "Yeah."

Me: *wanting to bash head into register* "Okay, go ahead."

There's only two things worse than that:

1) Springing the second order and paying both orders with cash when you could have combined them and just had one order. This is a little bit ridiculous, don'tchya think?

2) Springing the second order, not being ready with your money and then paying for the second order with the change I gave you back from the first one.... 

^Perfect face for that situation, lemme tell ya.

ARE YOU SEROUS RIGHT NOW. I ought-ta slap you. What was the point of that? Wouldn't it have been easier to just make it one order?

I don't particularly like taking two orders, but if you tell me in the beginning, it's a little easier on us, and we can have both of your orders ready when your car gets to the window.

Ordering a Burger at a Taco Joint... Srsly?

Every once in a while, we'll get a customer who tries to order from another fast food chain. 2% of the time, they're serious. Most of them think that we have coffee or some kind of cold dessert or shake, but we don't. And the other 98% just think they're funny. And you can tell, because you hear them all giggling in the car.


Me:"Hi, Welcome to *insert restaurant name here*. What can I get for you?"


Customer: "Yeah, I'd like a Whopper with cheese." *friends snickering behind in the back seat*


Me:

Some-distant-voice talking to driver: "Dude ask her for some fries."


Some-other-distant-voice: "And a shake!"


Customer to other people in the car while laughing: "Dude shut up!"


Me: "Sorry, could you repeat that?"


Customer while laughing: "Can I get a Whopper with cheese and fries."


Me: 

Me: "Sorry sir... Our burger sale ended last week. We're only selling tacos now."


Customer & passengers laughing: "Ohokay.  You guys suck!!" Drives off.


Me:

Barbecue Taco?

I used to love when we had taco night at my aunt's house. She would fry tostadas herself, and we'd have everything set up on a table, buffet style. We'd have all sorts of dipping sauces, like sour cream, some Ortega mild sauce, salsa, guacamole, and an assortment of other dips.


Now, my restaurant is not set up like this. We only have a couple kinds of sauces of varying intensity, sour cream, and guacamole. What we do not have is Barbecue sauce, Ranch Dressing, or Ketchup. But somehow people manage to ask us for these. I'm not quite sure why you would want Ranch or Barbecue sauce for your taco. That just doesn't seem... right. That seems like it would leave an incredibly wrong taste in your mouth... Kind of like mixing toothpaste and orange juice.


So not only do we not have people asking for sauces we do not have, we have people ask for "cheesy fries," or "supreme fries" to dip in the sauce. What??? My question is since when do you mix fries and tacos?! Your answer should be "Pics or it didn't happen," or "NEVARRR!"

^Although apparently it can be found on the internet. WHY??

False Advertising

For my company, there are commercials that are run for our promotions. Most of the time it lasts for about a month or two, but sometimes they are run long after the promotion ends. Like this week, a guy came in and ordered about $20 worth of food, then started asking about a promotional item that we used to have. He insisted on just recently seeing the commercial for it, so that meant we still had to have it. I wish that could make it true, but alas, it could not and I could not give him the food he desired. He got angry and left without any of his food, which my crew members had already started making and had to throw out.

Our registers get automatic updates every time we get a new item. Sometimes they take off some old keys to put on some new keys. This is the case most of the time. They also auto ship us these specialty things, such as sauces, breads/tortillas, or meats, and auto stop shipping them when it's over. So even if I had wanted to make the item that the gentleman ordered, it is impossible.

Like right now we have a deal where you can get three items and a drink for five dollars (plus tax, of course). This is a promotion. In a couple of weeks, it will go back up to $5.49 (plus tax, of course) and I will undoubtedly get a lot of angry customers who will insist that the commercial is still running, and that they should get a discount. The problem is not that I don't want to give them their food for only five dollars, it's that I can't. I do not have the ability. I would much rather do that than spend five minutes arguing with you. But that will not change anything.

So, moral of the story....... Don't believe everything you see on TV. Also, if you have questions about an item, ask about it before you order the rest of your food.

Patience is a Virtue

My restaurant is not the busiest restaurant, but like any food establishment we get busy sometimes. We only have one station on which we can make food, and it's visible to customers. We also have a screen that shows the orders we need to make, and how long they've been waiting. But because we only have one station, things can go kind of slow sometimes. If one person gets confused, they all kind of do.


Unfortunately, our priority is low service times at the drive-thru, so sometimes counter takes back-seat for a couple of minutes. I'm not saying this is ideal, but it's how we're run. "GET THAT WINDOW TIME DOWN TO 60 SECONDS OR ELSE!" But counter time can be at like 3 minutes.


It always seems that when we get hit in drive-thru, moments later we get hit up front, which is what happened today. Considering that you can see the food station, and the screen where the orders pop up, it astonishes me how angry people get sometimes when obviously there is going to be a wait. Why should you get your food before the guy that came in ten minutes ago?


If you walk in, and you can clearly see a group of people all off to the side and all with receipts in their hands, that probably means they're waiting for their order and that yours is not at the top of our list... or screen, because the screen is completely full of other orders. You should also clearly be able to see the food station and the fact that it is piled with tacos and burritos and other food items. And you should be able to see the three or four people trying to squeeze themselves onto this station to try and make sure your food gets to you. This means WE ARE TRYING. CALM DOWN. If you had to be somewhere in 5 minutes, you probably should have turned around when you saw the line.


Thank you for your patience, have a nice day.

Hell's Bells

So you know those restaurants that have a bell attached to a wall somewhere on your way out the door that you're supposed to ring if your service was good?
Well, we have one of those.

^Looks kind of like this

The sign doesn't specify on how many times you should ring it, but once is pretty standard. We don't mind if you ring it twice, or if your kids ring it a couple times. What we do mind, is when some group of teens comes in and thinks that trying to ring the bell so much that it chips the wood plaque it's on and makes everyone around them go deaf is an awesome idea. This happens fairly often. And we do, in fact, have a chip in the wood plaque that the bell is on. Weren't those guys cool?


Except for not.


And then we have the people who try to steal the clapper part of the bell. Just in case you're not sure what that is, it's the part that hits the inside of the bell to make the sound. Now, seeing as ours is so small, we have a rope/tassel-type-thing tied to it. To answer your other question: Yes. People do actually try to steal that. Not too often, but it has happened. I'm not quite sure what you would want with that. Although I suppose that's easier than trying to take the whole bell. Maybe for a souvenir? I can just imagine that story...


"Hey guys! Look what I stole from that *insert restaurant name here* we go to all the time! I don't think they saw me doing it. Man, what an adrenaline rush. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it. Maybe I'll make it a key chain, or a necklace, and wear it every time we go there!"


Hours later:
"What the *bleep* am I going to do with this thing? Maybe I should just take it back so we can ring the *other bleep* out of the bell."

If I say...

Today, our two drive thru registers were having technical difficulties and could not be used. So we had to kindly direct our drive-thru goers to come inside if they wanted to order. Some were okay with this, some were not, and inevitably some asked me, "What do you mean?"


What I wanted to say: "What do you mean, what do I mean? I just told you what I meant....!"
My actual response: "Our registers are not working, so we have to take the orders inside."
Their response: "Oh."


So, if I say, "Our registers aren't working," I don't mean, "Oh we're being lazy and don't want to take your order."
I actually mean, "Our registers aren't working."


Just like if you ask what size specialty drinks we have, and I say "regular or large," do not order a medium, because I DON'T HAVE A MEDIUM. I meant I only have regular or large sizes for that drink.


If I say, "A taco only comes with meat, lettuce, and cheese," that is all it comes with. It does not come with sour cream or tomatoes, that would be a different taco.


And if I happen to say, "I'll be with you in a moment," it means I need a moment to finish something and you should not order yet because I'm not ready. It does not mean that you should start ordering right after I finish my sentence.


The only time I don't mean what I say, is when a conversation goes like this:
Me: "Would you like any sauces with that?"
Creepy Customer: "No, but I'd like your name and number."
Me: "I lost it."
I did not actually mean that I lost my number. Sorry for lying to you, creepy customer, but I did not want you to have it.

Your Total is...

"Your total is..." I say this after every order I take. And yet, almost every time the customer gets to the window, they either ask me what it is, or sit there for a minute and a half getting the exact change. I appreciate exact change, I do. And I understand wanting to get rid of the excess change in your car, honestly. But I do not appreciate you waiting until you get to the drive-thru window to pull out your purse, or hunch in your seat to get your wallet out of your back pocket (when you should've had it out in the first place if you knew you were going to be buying something) and ask me four or five more times what your total is.


Me at the speaker: "Your total is: $2.53, thank you and pull around."
Customer: pulls off.
Me: opens the window "Hi, how are you?"
Customer: "I'm fine, and you? What did you say the total was?"
Me: "2.53"
Customer: has a five dollar bill in his/her hand, halfway out the window, but is hunched over, digging. Pulls out a handful of change from seemingly nowhere. "You said two-fifty-what?"
Me: "2.53"
Customer: "Sorry? 2.59?"
Me: "2.53"
Customer: Looks at the change in his/her hand again. "I only have fifty-two cents, is that okay?"
Me: "........... You can just give me the five, if you want."
Customer: "I really want to get rid of this change though."
*Le Timer beeps for the 4th time, indicating that you should've been gone 40 seconds ago*
Me: Getting kind of impatient. "Sure, I'm sure I have an extra penny in here somewhere."
Customer: "Great, thanks!"
Me: "Sure." 
Customer: FINALLY GIVES ME THE FIVE DOLLAR BILL, and the fifty-two cents. Which actually turned out to be fifty-three cents, because there was a penny stuck to the bottom of one of the quarters he/she gave me because they were sitting in his/her nasty drink holder.
Me: I think I just got trolled.


Too detailed? Too bad, happens to me all the time.


We're supposed to have a little screen right by the window where we take cash that tells you your total. Unfortunately ours isn't working right now, and sometimes our speaker is kind of unclear, so I understand maybe asking me once when you get there. But if you have to ask me multiple times, when I told you, not only at the speaker but at the window when you first asked me, don't get mad when I start getting a little impatient.


Granted, I think most people don't know that we get timed on how fast we get the food out. And sometimes it's not their fault. But when I have your order ready because it was just a few tacos, and you're digging around to find those two pennies instead of giving me the nickel I clearly see in your other hand, it's your fault if your food gets cold. And then do not ask me to remake it, because I watched them make it just now, and it's your fault it's cold anyways. Those were made fresh, probably when you started ordering at the speaker.


So I'll hand your order out, thank you, and tell you to have a nice day, with a wonderful smile plastered to my face.


So please, dear fast food consumers, the place you order and the place you pay are different for a reason. There is that space in between the two in which you should take a few extra seconds to get out your purse and/or wallet and get out your money/card. This makes things so much easier for everyone. I don't get grumpy, and your food doesn't get cold. :)


Still want to get rid of your change? Take it to the bank, or to one of those coin machines, and you can turn it into cash, just like magic!

Introductions!

Hello, fellow bloggers/blog readers.

I work in the fast food industry, and I bet you can't guess what we sell....

I've been working with food since I was 14 or 15, and I am 22 now. That's too long, if you ask me, but I don't see it ending anytime soon. Sometimes I'm okay with that and some days I would really, really, like to walk out on it, to hell with the consequences. Except for then I remember that I like having a car, a roof over my head, and sometimes a little extra spending money. There's also the ever-dreaded student loan payment.

I tend to tell the same few people the same few stories, so I've decided to give them a break and to tell you instead, whoever you may be.

So for those of you don't work in fast food, may this be entertaining. And to those of you who do work in fast food, you are not alone! I too, feel your pain. Also, I hope this is entertaining for you, too.

So please, sit back, relax, and read on as the truthful testimonials from the taco trenches transpire.